is everything going to be ok?

Posted on October 7th, 2010

It is, you know. Because everything is OK right now. Not in five minutes. Not in five seconds. Right now, as you read the message on the steps, it is. OK. Right?

photo

This picture was taken in the lobby of the Ace Hotel when I was in New York a few months back. I found it on my iphone just now.

The wonderful Eckhart Tolle instructs, as an exercise in seeing the beauty of the present, to ask yourself, “what’s the issue right now?”. Not tomorrow, not in 30 minutes, not in 1 minute, not in one second from now. What’s the issue right now. Of course, you find yourself realising that there is no issue in the present. You just can’t conjure one. Only in the past and the future are there issues.

Try it. Um, like, now.

I think one of the kindest gestures you can proffer someone is to ask if they’re OK. I say this today, because it’s National RUOK Day. The premise, from watching Hugh below, is to simply reach out to someone and ask, “Are you OK?”. It’s geared at staving off suicide, and helping out someone struggling on their own.

I went through a rough patch about three years ago and my friend KJ would call me almost every day just to see if I was OK. I always said I was. Because in the instant that she asked me, I would be. That’s often how it works. Another friend Jacinta T has a habit of calling to “check in”. She would literally want an update on where I was at in life. And my mate Josh C does the same. He’ll get a feeling that something might be a bit awry with me and text or call or suggest we have a tea. It’s like he can smell my frazzledness across the suburbs.

We can all do this, I think. Smell someone’s frazzledness or sadness or loneliness or hard times from afar. You know when someone you haven’t seen for a bit will just pop into your mind and you’ll have this feeling that something strong is going on for them? If you call them, they’ll say, “Funny you should call…”.

The beautiful challenge for all of us is to act on our intuition. To pick up the phone and ask someone who comes to your minds’ eye, are you OK? There doesn’t have to be a problem implied. Just a desire to connect. And to bring both of you into the present moment.

Where everything is going to be alright.

Related Posts with Thumbnails
  • http://littlelioness.net Fiona

    Unfortunately I hold it together long enough, until I’m asked how I am, then I lose it.

    But I’m getting help. I’m getting there.

    [Reply]

  • http://stylepint.com Jess

    I really do appreciate it when others check-in on me. Sometimes, we assume that we’re doing ok until we’re asked. Thanks for the post! =)

    [Reply]

  • James

    Have checked in with 2 people this morning………it helps them, it helps me……connect.

    Tolle helped change my life (right time right place) 3 years ago.

    [Reply]

  • Ian

    This is a lovely post Sarah. Love the line: “Smell someone’s frazzledness or sadness or loneliness or hard times from afar.” and raising awareness of this sense. I typically “listen” out for such and make a point of acting on what I hear.

    Super you acknowledge a great cause too.

    [Reply]

  • http://innerbeam.blogspot.com Sarah Rose

    Thanks Sarah, I was feeling a little lost just now and in need of a bit of ‘Sarah Wilson Perspective’. I knew that upon arriving at your blog I would find something that resonates with my truth and therefore experience a lovely soothing of my soul. I did. Everything IS ok now, this is something I frequently remind myself of and it brings such great peace. As borrowed from Louise Hay’s ‘You Can Heal Your LIfe’ I choose to remind myself that ‘I am perfect, whole and complete as I am right now.’ I appreciate that you’re promoting checking in with others and at the same time reminding us to check in with ourselves. Nice one :-)

    [Reply]

  • Mia

    Thank you for asking Sarah! I’m A-OK. :)

    And I just asked a few friends if they were ok too. Made a few dinner dates and a few smiles happen so, thank you for the gentle nudge!

    [Reply]

  • Viola

    @Fiona

    Hang in there! I went through a really difficult patch a couple of years ago where everything just seemed to fall apart. I was so depressed, wanted to leave my husband, leave the country, just leave. I felt completely disconnected and desperately lonely. But, like you, I got help and I can honestly tell you I am now better than I have ever been. The tangle has untangled. Life is light. I am me and more.

    Be kind to yourself. Be gentle. Everything will be alright.

    [Reply]

  • http://gillstannard.com.au Gill Stannard Naturopath

    I had a bit of culture shock when I first moved to Australia. Acquaintances would ask “how are you?” in passing, usually without stopping. It was their way of saying hello but to me the “how are you?” is a question, one I ask when I genuinely want to know the answer, not a salutation when passing a colleague in the corridor.

    It’s a great question to ask but for me the pause after, the eye contact and the time to hear the answer is the most important part.

    [Reply]

  • http://www.healthyfoodguide.com.au georgia rickard

    Sarah Wilson,

    I love your way!

    I get your words. I love your posts. They make my Friday. Thank you xx

    [Reply]

  • Ezzy

    Like Sarah Rose, I too feel that your perspective resonates utter truth – For me anyway!

    There is nothing better when you are asked if you are ok, and it is truly meant… I am calling some special people in my life today to see if they are ok!

    Thankyou – All love to you!!

    [Reply]

  • http://www.livingsavvy.com.au Jo-living savvy

    I have wonderful & strong friends around me who are checking in with me and also telling me that it is ok not to be ok all the time giving me permission to let go of needing to hold
    it together every moment in what had been a sad time for me recently.

    [Reply]

  • Janet

    whats the issue right now?

    My mum is dead… I miss her so much and it hurts like hell…. its the issue every second of every day….

    [Reply]

  • Pingback: Tuesday eats: a gluten free recipe from Cannelle et Vanille | Sarah Wilson

  • Pingback: Five for Friday :: 15 October 2010 | Nourishing the Soul - A forum on body image and the effects of eating disorders

  • http://www.nurseanesthetistzone.com nurse practitioner

    this post is very usefull thx!

    [Reply]

  • Matilde Crofoot
  • Brittany

    Remember this. Remember this. It is so hard. Cant seem to stop worrying…

    [Reply]

  • lamont hodges

    thank you sara I needed this

    [Reply]