I ask, “How are you?”.
“Busy”. “Flat out”. “So much going on.” That’s what I get back.
We might be busy. But busy is a choice of mindset, if you think about it.
It’s funny, busy-ness is what creates our aching need for more self-care and a deep desire to live a life we actually want. And yet, it’s also the the thing that prevents us from having this life.
Or put simply: we are too busy to live. Which is just craziness!
There’s also this. When I ask how you are, I’m not asking if you’re busy or not. The satiating, more connecting answer is a true description of where you are at, behind the busyness. The real you that’s always there, regardless of how much activity you’ve chosen to sign up for.
I read that Arabic for “How are you?” is Kayf haal-ik? In Persian it’s Haal-e shomaa chetoreh?
Which translates as,
“How is the state of your heart, in this breath?”
This is what I’m wanting to know. At parties, over coffee, even in work meetings, I’d rather know where your heart is at, whether it’s aching for more love and outlets for giving. Whether it’s feeling a lightness of possibility. Whether it feels clouded in by restrictive thinking from the head. I want to know these things so I can feel less alone and we can connect. As we all crave to.
I’m going to try working from this conversational pivot for a while…see what happens. Join me?