I like this idea…British scientist Sydney Smith wrote a letter to an unhappy female friend in the early 1800s. It listed 20 things to do to be happy.
I liked his comments on friends, points 6 and 7:
6. See as much as you can of those friends who respect and like you.
7. And of those acquaintances who amuse you.
It’s a good delineation and formula, don’t you think. So much can grow from an interaction if the foundation is simply “they like me, they get me”.
For me, when there is this is the energy between me and my closest mates, I become more likeable.
Do you find when you’re with a “friend” who you sense doesn’t really get you, you misbehave? I have an old friend who has it in her head that I don’t have time for her and posits my life as pretentious and “too Sydney”. So, of course I find myself really unreliable in making time for her. And with a fake tan whenever I see her (or at least looking like I have one). I mirror her expectations of me.
On the acquaintance front: sometimes I just crave the skim-the-surface-flirtatiously interaction you can have with someone you don’t really have a lot in common with, but who has a light energy. The interaction is very now. Very much about the sport of communicating.